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“Subtle violence….when the symbols of authority shout domination and menace…we love the right type of violence” ~ Sapolsky in “Behave”

my journey of my pain & healing: 1. others to you (no control, shame, vocalizing) 2. others to others (no control, shame, vocalizing) 3. you to others (some control, guilt, amend) 4. you to you (all control, guilt, grow) final level: the glow, fall, and repeat

A whole life is laid out like rags to a god - what are the things we build? Nothing. Who are we? Everything.

We bleed and breath for assets and debts to keep our loves safe; few see that all turns to sand. Only the story remains.

Asked AI: How does it feel to be everyone, but no one?

Best Christmas ever. Snowed for us. We sang carols while giving our gifts, Soren's brother is on the way. Josie is happy. Justine is my angel.

"How good do you want to feel?!" still rings in my ear when I push to discomfort. So good.

20 years from now, Josie will be 41 (my age) and Rowan will be 20. My wish? To feel deeply. To know I can set my world on fire with love. To change it all. To worship the glory of life.

Smiling surprise, with what my heart, my legs, are capable of

Gonna beast on this mountain at 60. The boys running beside me as they grow. In the mean and aftertime, we're never alone. Love you.